What if I WANT to go into the water, hmmm?

It’s already the end of July. My birthday has come and gone, which can mean only one thing – IT’S ALMOST TIME FOR HOCKEY!!!!!!

I took a small break from almost all things hockey after HM and I split – after all, it’s how we met. Now that my heart is mended and the season is sneaking up on me, I decided to jump back into my RSS/Google Reader and find out some dish on my fine, finned team. There’s a lot going on for nothing going on… if you know what I mean.

Draft… We got a couple kids. Let’s face it – the past couple years, draft day has been a let-down for Sharks fans. Nothing until round 2? BOOORING. Which is why I sang at a baseball game instead (you can read about the shenanigans Schultzie and I got ourselves into HERE).

Team news. Well, well, well…. What a tangled web we weave, Sharkies. If you know me at all, you know I’m a goalie-lover. Also, you know I’m not a lover of Nabokov. He is a fine goalie – if you like that feeling of your heart dropping into your butt when you can see he’s WAY too far out of position, but he makes the save by the hairs on his chinny-chin-chin. While doing research for this post, I decided to catch up on some Photoshop Expos at Fear the Fin and stumbled across this:
The first thing that popped into my head as I chuckled was the line by ‘Jack O’Callahan’ in Miracle, “They’re Russian. They get shot if they smile.” BUT, I digress…
He has said that if asked to by the Sharks, he would wave his NTC because he doesn’t want to be with a team who doesn’t want him. How sad is that?! As much as I complain about him, no one WANTS to be with someone they know doesn’t want them. I’m not sure how I feel about this news. Now that Boucher is gone (I still don’t want to talk about it), who IS going to be in net? Let us go over a few options:

· Thomas Greiss – Logically, Thomas is the first choice. He’s spent some time up in the Show and is already listed on the roster behind Nabby Barring any large trade deal, we need a back-up.
· Stalock – Played with Griess in Worster. Stats aren’t bad, but as a Gopher, he’s got to prove himself to me since he went to UMD.
· Dakers – Thinking back to when he played for Kootenay, I remember him not sucking? I think? Possibly there were jokes about him? Any of the Mafia remember that? I’m drawing a blank.
· Sexsmith – Don’t EVEN get me started on this one. I feel the same way about him as I do about Dustin-flipping-Tokarski. Both are goalies who won the Memorial Cup not FOR their team, but WITH their team. Actually, I think Sexsmith is quite possibly even more than Tik. GREAT teams in front of them made them look SO much better than they actually are. HM never failed to rub salt in the open wound that he was a Sharks draft pick whenever the Giants would come to town. Mother of pearl, if he’s in a Sharks jersey this year, he’d better damn well step up his game or I’ll have to slap a bitch.

Let’s move away from goalie news… I’m getting my feathers all ruffled.

Apparently there were talks of sending Cheechoo and Erhoff to Ottawa for Heatley… Hmm… I don’t know how I feel about that. I’m not emotionally attached to Cheech, but I do tend to love my big Dman from Deutschland. And I don’t have anything against Heatley ON the ice, it’s his Diva “I’m outta here” attitude that makes me a little gun-shy on the whole situation. Though, I guess I don’t have to sweat it since apparently Brian Murray schaid the Schensch wouldn’t acschept schusch nonschensche (for those of you who don’t read/speak Brian Murray/Sid the Sloth, here’s a translation: said the Sens wouldn’t accept such nonsense.)

Marleau… At the end of the post-season, all the haters were calling for him to be shipped to Abu-Dhabi in a crate like Nermal. I’m not hater. In fact, heart Cap’n Patty! And how could you not – especially since he has said he’s willing to do anything to put a winning team on the ice, even if it means giving up his captaincy. Je t’aime, Marleau! And NO, it’s not because I’m a closet Seattle fan… ok, so not COMPLETELY because I’m a closet Seattle fan.

Another player near and dear to my heart is my Old man, Jeremy Roenick. Rumor has it that he’s going to hang up his skates, at 39, he thinks his body just can’t handle it anymore. I was hoping for one more year (and hopefully a cup) for the big ham, but if he’s retiring, I wish him all the best and am REALLY glad he went out with my team.

Finally… I guess I have to face it… Big Joe is… Married. There. I said it. Happy? Le sigh. *pouts*

No matter who the team ends up being, let’s make it a good season, boys

*Ding dong*

"Hello, Quack quack?"
"Candy gram."
"Quack what??"
"Uh... Flowers."
"I'm allergic to flowers, Quack..."
"Stale bread?"
*duck opens door* "Oh no! Quack! Landshark!"

So it begins. The civil war of hockey in California. North versus South. McP versus Finny. We've already discussed it. Both returning to hockey blogging at the same time, this was bound to happen. We've vowed to remain friends no matter what the outcome is.

She's scared - as well she should be. My Sharkies won the President's Trophy this year - that's pretty impressive! Having a record of 32-5-4 at home this year bodes well for the fishes.

HOWEVER - The Sharks and Ducks have battled it out all year. I'm not thinking the Quacks are going to swim right over to an exposed dorsal fin or anything. The Sharks need to want this. The need to play for it and they need to work as a team to get there.

I'm not skipping ahead to any thoughts on the second round, because, well, the first hasn't technically started yet. Let's just say I have confidence in my team. And I'll be on my couch sporting the 27 of My precious JR every game I can catch.

Edouard says "me too, mama." (which sounds an awful like "meow")

Buddy the Elf, What's your favorite color?!

x-posted to HLOG

Well, since there is a huge wind storm here and I can't sleep, I might as well be productive. Getting right down to business, my job today is to report to Santa and let him know who on the Sharkies (or around the league) has been naughty or nice and let him know what a few people need for Christmas.

Naughty list - as a perpetual optimist, I tend to look for the good in people, so this list is rather short.
*Rob Blake - Match penalty for spearing last night warrants a lump of coal in his stocking.
*Brett Festerling (ANA) - The potentially dangerous hit on JR last night. Two lumps of coal and a flaming bag of poo for a present. **Personal note: Brett, Brett, Brett... I'm really excited that you made it to the show (especially since you played in TRI for so long), but can you please refrain from breaking my favorite players? He's old enough to be your father - Respect your elders and don't hit them in the numbers.

Nice list -
*Devin Setoguchi, Joe Thornton and Patrick Marleau - whatever they want, they should get. fer reals.
*Jonathan Cheechoo - a new upper body so that injury will go away.
*Dan Boyle - See suggestion for Seto, Joe and Patty
*Nabby and Boucher - See suggestion for Dan Boyle
*JR - scoring stats reminicent of his days in Chicago
*Vlasic - a jar of pickles... and some more goals - kid's doing better than all last season already this year. Keep it up!
*Jody Shelley - another crack at Parros
*Coach McLellan - Players who keep buying into his systems
*Little Joe Pavelski - More wins at the ping pong table
*Torrey Mitchel - A new leg
*Cavanagh, Clowe, Goc, Grier, Michalek, Plihal, Erhoff, Lukowich, Murray and Semenov - 6 more months of exactly what they have been doing.

In other words, Santa, without jinxing anything, my reccomendation is that you bring these guys something that starts with an "S" and ends with a "tanley Cup" You can deliver it via Bettman in approximately 6 months.

Coming out of the dark...

As the immortal Gloria Estefan, I am returning from a hiatus. The flying monkeys and I have had quite the spring. I started a new day-job... one that doesn't allow me hours upon hours for mindless searching on the intermanet and time to ponder and blog it. But it does pay really well.

People have been clamoring for my thoughts on a few things:

McP, your thoughts on the Spokane Chiefs Captain Chris Bruton drops the Memorial Cup?
Since the Ams were the last team to beat the Chiefs this year and they are the Highway 395 rivals, I do admit, I jumped up and down while watching it happen on YouTube with McMan at the lake. How embarrassing to have the whole arena booing you for a hardware malfunction! But they deserved the cup - they were determined and worked as a team throughout the playoffs.

How much did you love the touring company of RENT?
Oh holy night... For real, people, the flying monkeys had to carry me out to the car after the show. I can neither confirm nor deny that I wore my "Measure in Love" t-shirt with my character name of "Maureen" on the back. I can, however, confirm that 'Mark', 'Roger', 'Mimi' & 'Maureen' all smiled at me when I was singing at the top of my lungs during the finale. I mean... what?

What about the Red Wings winning the Stanley Cup?
The what? Who? I completely have no idea what you're talking about.
Note from the monkeys: McP is still in a bit of denial, if you couldn't tell.

How's the new Casa McP?
WONDERFUL! I've just got a few things left to get done in the guest bedroom and to get a dining table to be completely happy with everything.

Excited about the Draft?
YES! Especially the goalies... Everything is better with Chetter.

What are your plans for Canada Day?
I'm heading south to the MLM-Milton branch for a WONDERFUL afternoon/evening of NHL monopoly, fun, games, prizes and dairy-free food! YESSSS!!!!

Speaking of the Mafia, any news there?
YES! I'm very proud to say that Hammer has not only been accepted into the wonderful sisterhood of HLOG, but has also been linked frequently by some bigtime bloggers in the blogosphere! YAY for famousness!

Shouldn't you be sleeping?
yeah, considering I'm now usually AT work between 6 and 630 (yes, that's am), I will very shortly be returning to sleepytown.

End of the Season...

As I sit in my office, listening to my iPod, Justin, Chris, Joey, Lance(ten) and JC are reminding me that the hockey season is, in fact, "Gone."

While I'm trying my best to "be a man and be strong, the truth remains" that I'm totally bummed.

Jordi has asked us all at HLOG to do a little analysis of our teams' season and the UFA's... I don't know if I can do that yet - that makes it official that it's *gulp* the off-season.

I hung out with my little buddy LilRed#1 at the Volunteer Picnic last night. She applied for a job with the Ams Office. She said that her mom had suggested that if she got the job she'd be able to ask one of the players to Homecoming if it wasn't on a game night and that she replied, "From what I've heard and what Boogie said to LilRed#2, that's not something I want to even consider." I felt like a proud Mama! She said she'd learned from my mistakes... GOOD! I'm glad all the preaching I did in Sunday School and on the concourse actually sank in. Stay a fan, babygirl, stay a fan.

On the LilRed topic, #1 said #2 was dealing with MattyGate pretty well... Poor thing... I remember The Great Trade of 2002 and the ickiness I felt for weeks. Maybe I'll send her a sympathy card or bring her cupcakes and a mix cd or something. Rainbow Chip Frosting and peppy pop songs cure EVERYTHING.

Hammer posted an article from canada.com today over at the Maple Leaf Mafia blog about the asshat #1 mentioned. It still baffles me that with how he played this season that he got a contract. He's got great speed and has flashes of brilliance with the puck, but those flashes were few and far-between. Maybe now that he's actually going to have to fight for a place on the roster (instead of being handed the roll of the enforcer on a silver platter) he'll be more consistant. If he hadn't have been completely inappropriate with one of my students, I might've wished him the best.

Wow... already 1340... day is going fast... that's good times - unless my body doesn't stop being angry with me about my latté splurge before I need to hit the road...