Classless. (Warning, McPhizzle is McPISSED!!!)

from the blog Slap Shots written by Greg Harder of the Regina Leader-Post

First impressions on the two newest members of the Regina Pats, C Tim Kraus and D Juraj Valach:
Kraus is thrilled to be here and can’t wait for a fresh start after a strained co-existence with Giants head coach Don Hay. Kraus reportedly worked his butt off in the summer to get into the best shape of his life. He seems eager to prove he can fit in with the Pats and be a major contributor. By all accounts, a motivated Kraus is a force to be reckoned with.

Valach was more disappointed to leave Vancouver than Kraus but he’s saying all the right things about his new team. If Pats head coach Curtis Hunt can light a fire under the towering rearguard, he could add another dangerous weapon to Regina’s already potent blueline. Valach’s English is decent, so communication shouldn’t be a huge issue. It remains to be seen if past reports of an attitude problem surface in Regina.Asked why he demanded a trade from the Tri-City Americans this summer, Valach explained he didn’t like his billets or the city and simply didn’t feel comfortable there. Tri-City GM Bob Tory took some parting shots at Valach after the deal, but there’s two sides to every story. The Pats are giving him the benefit of the doubt.

The Pats should watch their backs... .What a classless little ass... I feel like I can say this since my parents were his billets and after he flew off the handle at me for writing MY opinion of why he didn't get drafted in MY OWN EFFING BLOG, he sent me This little exeprt from an email titled "Redhead = BAD head!" (laugh, I did) :

.........I like [Ma] and I like [PA] but I hate you sorry
[McPhizzle]

You're on a new team (again) Juraj, You're playing hockey. Be happy for that, the past is the past... QUIT TRASH-TALKING MY FAMILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

UPDATE:

Good grief. I was NOT expecting what I got upon arrival at the home of Ma and Pa after work.

I got a check to cover my new deposit, part of my new rent AND enough $$ to hire movers to move my piano (and probably a few of the heavier furniture items. ).

I also got the title to my car. That's right, ladies and germs, the flying monkeys had to hold me up, because I still had about 2.5 years of payments left. Being the schmaltz I am, I squirted a few tears like a little bitch. Ma's comment, "What are you crying for? You didn't win a crown!"
My reply, "This is so much better than a crown!"

So I came home, Roomie2.0 wasn't here, so I called her and let her know the news. She took it pretty well... and I also told her that her felon wasn't allowed back here - oddly enough, she didn't come home tonight - well, at least she hasn't come home yet.

I've been packing all night. I have the living room, piano/dining area, hall cabinet and most of the kitchen and laundry rooms packed. My closet is clean, so I'll just take all that over as-is... after all, it's not too terribly far away. (and right next door to my friend Tracey, who I referred to the complex and should be getting my $250 "thank you" check soon) I need to pack up my CDs, the stuff in my armoir, my stationary (that'll be a chore for sure!) and the stuff under my bed. Oh... and the rest of my bathroom... jeebus.... well, at least I have a few days to do it, right? of course right!

I'm pretty devistated about my cat. I'm just not home enough to take care of her on my own. At least with Roomie2.0 and her felon here I knew she'd get fed if she whined. Speaking of whining, she's mewing her tiny tiny little mew outside my door right now b/c I wont let her into my room to chew on the papers and books i have under my bed while I sleep. I know, I'm a horrible kittymama. Plus, I just can't handle looking at her knowing that she's not going to be mine much longer. :(

GAH!

Well, Casa McP is going to have a new address in 10 days or less.

That's right. I said it, 10 days OR LESS.

See, I got a call today from my apartment manager asking if I still had Roomie2.0 living there. I said yes, not knowing she hadn't turned in her application for living in our complex. Manager said, "Ok, you've got 10 days for her to vacate or we're going to have to evict you."

SQUWA-SQUWAH!?

This all stems from her b/f being arrested in our apt for felony charges the 2nd or 3rd day she lived at my place. She also got a ticket for obstructing justice - which is why she wont be approved to live at our apartments.

So we went over the options, I could stay in my fabulous apartment and pay ALL the rent until Dec. 31, Pay the $1400 it is to break my lease and move somewhere else or since I'm the only name on the lease now, transfer the lease over to a 1 BR apartment in the complex. Since I'm not made of money (although I do like to think I am) I went for option #3. Therefore, on or before October 5, I'll be living across the complex.

I've got PUD set up to be turned on the 3rd... and if I need it earlier, then I can call and change it. I need to figure out when i can get in so that I can call and have my sattelite dish moved. Need to start calling all of my credit card companies and magazine subscriptions to get those changed over to the right apt. number.

Oh. And Papa McP will be contributing greatly to the McPhizzle Financial Fund. His support is greatly appreciated... as are viewers like you. (but i'm not paying you back like i am him.)

While moving is TOTALLY stressfull and SO not fun, i'm STOKED to do it. Not only do I get into my own place where i don't have to share my kitchen with anyone (really, it's a huge pet peeve of mine...) but i also get away from the drama that is my new roommate situaton. YAY! Oh, and I'll be hosting Canadian Thanksgiving in my own pad. :)

Adoption Announcement!

McPhizzle proudly presents the newest member of the Maple Leaf Mafia, who was adopted on September 18, 2007.

Her name is Muffin (McMan said I couldn't name her Toskala... party pooper), she's approximately 5-6 weeks old as far as McMan and I can tell, and since I'm refering to her in the female form, she's a chick.


Tiny widdle Muffin McP. More pics on the Facebook!

She's a fluffy little ball of puffness that Roomie2.0's friend found at the loading dock of the new Target out in West that she works at. Roomie2.0 (and her beau) were afraid I was allergic, however, I am not, tend to love kittehs (see: here) and instantaniously fell deeply in love with her and went on a kitty shopping spree at Target.

She slept on my lap and then on my bed all night... She woke up about 5:30 and decided my arm looked like a fun toy, so I took her back into the Laundry room for her to have some fun with her food, water, litter box and leopard print colapsable kitty tent.

I love her. You may love her as well. Especially when she starts chiming in on the upcoming hockey season!

Patriot Day

I usually save my emotional, political and/or religious posts for my personal blog, saving this one for fun and humor. However, today is a special day. A day of remembrance, thankfulness, reflection and prayer.


9-11. As many Americans do, every year on this day I think of the horror that crept into my heart when I heard the news. My mother woke me up to tell me what happened. The sadness in her eyes as she saw me break down, knowing that this was war. My uncle Eric was in the Air Force, My boyfriend, a cadet, was about to be commissioned as an officer in the US Army. She lived through Vietnam and lost her first love there and hoped it wouldn't happen to me as well.

Driving to the post office today, I remembered why I love living in small-ish-town America - American flags up and down the street on different buildings. Homes, Businesses, Churches. Indeed, God Blesses America.

I heard this on the way to work this morning and it touched my heart and brought a peace over me. It was a poem written by Stacey Randall, voiced by Bob Holiday over "Silent Night". ( click here to hear it )

Met in the Stairwell

You say you will never forget where you were when you heard the news, Sept. 11, 2001. Neither will I.

I was on the 110th floor in a smoke filled room with a man who called his wife to say "Good-bye." I held his fingers steady as he dialed. I gave him the peace to say, "Honey, I am not going to make it, but it is OK...I am ready to go."

I was with his wife when he called as she fed breakfast to their children. I held her up as she tried to understand his words and as she realized he wasn't coming home that night.

I was in the stairwell of the 23rd floor when a woman cried out to me for help. "I have been knocking on the door of your heart for 50 years!" I said. "Of course I will show you the way home -- only believe on Me now."
I was at the base of the building with the Priest ministering to the injured and devastated souls. I took him home to tend to his Flock in Heaven. He heard my voice and answered.

I was on all four of those planes, in every seat, with every prayer. I was with the crew as they were overtaken. I was in the very hearts of the believers there. Comforting and assuring them that their Faith has saved them.

I was in Texas, Kansas, London. I was standing next to you when you heard the terrible news. Did you sense Me? I want you to know that I saw every face. I knew every name-though they did NOT all know Me. Some met me for the first time on the 100th floor. Some sought me out in their last breath. Some couldn't hear me calling to them throughout the smoke and flames, "Come to Me...this way...take my hand." Some chose, for the final time, to ignore Me. But, I was there.

I did not place you in the Tower that day--you may not know why, But I DO. However, if you were there in that explosive moment in time, would you have reached for Me? September 11, 2001, was not the end of the journey for you. But someday your journey will end. And I will be there for you as well. Seek Me now while I may be found. Then, at any moment, you know you are "ready to go." I will be in the stairwell of your final moments.

Remember. I love you.

God

Copyright©2002 Stacey Randall

Amen.

JR is Swimmin with the Fishes

(x-posted to HLOG)


The Newest Fishie in the Bay

Doug Wilson (DW as I like to call him) called up his old buddy (and former teammate) Jeremy Roenick and got him to sign a $500,000, one-year deal with the San Jose Sharks.

"A lot of teams expected me to retire and thought I was retiring," Roenick said
Tuesday. "But it took the initiative of one person to make the phone call to
find out is that was really happening.

"This is not a financial thing for me," Roenick told reporters on a conference call. "I even asked for a bit less. My motivation is to win a Cup. My motivation is to try and gain my respectability as a hockey player back. ...

"The only reason that I would be playing this year is because of Doug Wilson and the opportunity that he's given me to play with, I think, the best team in the National Hockey League, and have a chance to win a Stanley Cup."

"We know Jeremy very well," said Wilson. "This is not a negative to where he's been in prior situations, but I think a player like this has to be in a situation where he perceives an ability to win and the ultimate winning being competing for a Cup."

I, Personally, love this. I've always been a big JR fan... (what can I say, I love loud mouths!) I think with the right linemates he could be a big contributer again. That's not saying I think he's going to have another 50-goal year or anything, but I don't see a down-side here. He's not taking up a lot of salary-cap room, and as long as he doesn't throw a water bottle at anyone, he's not a huge liability. (teehee... as inapropriate as that was, i loved it)

Welcome to my Sharkies, "Jer-my"!

Alumni Update

Well, it seems that hockey season is fast approaching. YAY! As I said when CapsChick and I were chatting it up, "If the off-season was any longer, I'd call my brother and ask him to send me an old glove to sniff."

Which brings me to the updates:

• It seems that the Houston Aeros are now the Houston "McPhizzle has a humorous anecdote about me"s... Not only do they have Clayton Stoner (former Am and good friend) and Coach Kevin Constantine (former coach of the Everett Silvertips), but they have also signed goalie (and former Spokane Chief) Barry Brust and (former Golden Gopher) Troy Riddle.
• Big Bro is now going to be playing in Europe... Something he's wanted to do for a couple years now. He's going to be playing in the UK for the Hull Stingrays and oddly enough, one of his teammates is Nikolai Ladygin (another former Am)

really? for real?

Tuesday... not usually a BAD day, per se, but this one didn't start out too hot...

I woke up late. On purpose, but late. Left the house at about 8:20 to stop in quickly at Dr. S's office and get a persecription for something to make what I thought was bronchitis go away. Get into the parking lot, slow down and stop behind a minivan that is about to park and all of a sudden, her reverse lights go on.... she starts backing up.... she ignores the sound of my blaring horn and all I hear is *crunch* well, before I said, "fucking shit" and put my car in park. No damage... And oddly enough, she was wearing one of the breast cancer awareness Ams shirts. Hmm.. Like I told McMan, "I decided not to comment on it in the fear that I'd tell her she didn't deserve to don the logo of MY team if she's going to back into me."

So, after she parks the van and i go down the few more offices and park in front of my dr's office, I go in, see the doctor and he tells me I don't have bronchitis or a sinus infection. I have asthma. Oh. Joy. And please please please tell me why it takes 20 minutes to put an inhaler together... I'm assuming they had to hand craft the plastic holder there in the pharmacy at Walgreens.

Yeah. It was an awesome morning.... and to think, I was all ready to wirte a hockey post about training camp so far.... SO i'm just going to post photos from the annual Todd Klassen Memorial Classic game, which was held at the buttcrack of dawn on Sunday. (photos by MLM photographer VonHammer)



Me singing the anthems after running around the arena... i thought they were going to re-zam the ice. oops.


Thrilling hockey action = painting the nails in the stands

Best Lunchbreak EVER!

The morning started with an early rise from bed. I showered, straightened my hair and took myself to work. Once again, no blueberry scones at Starbucks. Someday I'm going to call and complain abut that. Get to work and most of Downtown K-Town has NO power. Even the traffic signals were out. (Ps- no one in this town knows how to use a freakin 4-way stop!) I sat out in the foyer and read the paper and drank my coffee b/c our phone system is also electric. After I read through the classifieds and saw 2 pianos for sale, I decided that's what I was going to ask for for Christmas from my parents. With that thought, I went into the Chapel and played the piano that one of the bosses is storing here until their new house is finished until the power came back on.

At about 11, I took a lunchbreak, which I normally don't do at all, but I needed to drop my jeans off at Buckle to get them hemed (yay for free alterations! 8 inches off the XXL jeans). As I was driving down Canal Drive, I saw an upright piano sitting on a trailer at Ernie's Car Place with a bright yellow tag on it that I thought said $250. That can't be right! I thought to myself. I turned my little car around and went to check it out. Not only did it say $250, but it said, "WAS $250 NOW $150 OBO". OH. EM. GEE! I marched into the office and asked if he'd take $100 for it. I am now the proud owner of an upright piano.

I emailed Roomie2.0 telling her that i made a BIG impulse purchase and that I'd be really flexible with any furniture arrangements she wanted to make lol.

It's going to cost me an arm and a leg to have it moved... From the quote I got from the company that I liked the best anywhere from $149-$225. Then in 2-3 weeks I'll have it inspected, cleaned and tuned to the tune of $95 (+$35 if it needs extensive tuning). But still, that's an upright piano in MY apartment in MY posession for $420 or less. YESSS. And then, about 1:10, my ma calls me and tells me to come out front because she has something for me. I meet her outside my office and she hands me a bag of money. $70 to help toward the movers. How much do I love this woman?!

I emailed Rabbi Herschel about it... his response, "That's awesome about your piano. I don't envy the movers getting it up the stairs to your apartment though... yuck... Let me know when it arrives, I'll play you a jaunty tune!" Jaunty tune party at my house!!!!

It's old and a little beat up, but it's a PIANO and it's got character. My own piano. I really didn't think I'd ever have one... well, at least until I was grown and married or something. I'm freaking out. I may or may not be a little fahklempt. Talk amongst ya'selves. :)

NEWSBREAK!

Ok, so the title of my blog isn't exactly correct anymore. There will still be musings and they're still coming from someone radical, but technically I'm not a redhead anymore.

*pause for you to catch your breath*

I know it's a big decision, but I've been thinking about it for about a year and yesterday took the plunge into Brunettehood. I still surprise myself when i look in the mirror.

MissRoomie loves it, as does the McMan, although it took his Hetrosexual Life Partner (aka his roomie... aka MrRoomie) pointing it out for him to notice (see photos below for how redonkulous that was) - the UPS guy noticed within 10 seconds of being in my office. McMan held several conversations with me before he was tipped off.

MrRoomie: (2 seconds after seeing McP) Hey! You did something different with your hair. it looks nice!
McP: THANK YOU!
MrRoomie: Ooooh..... You're in TROUBLE!
McMan: I noticed, I just didn't say anything b/c she doesn't like it when people make a big fuss over her hair when she straightens it. (which is true - and he got brownie points for remembering that and saying it aloud)
McP: kind of fuming
MrRoomie: Dude! She changed the color of it!
McMan: She did? (looks at McP) OOPS!

Photos:


(ok, so my eyes are closed, big whoop... lol)

Damnit, Uncle Wayne, Help a sister out!!!

Ok, for reals? Just when we get our hopes all up that the jolly green giants in Everett might not be the US Division "Champs" yet again, Uncle Wayne has to go and dash my hopes and dreams. Then again, there's always hopes that with Constantine gone to coach in Houston that they might not be the trap-playing bore that they have been the past 4(?) years. Hopefully they're still the WHL Diving Team, though.... they could win gold at the next summer games...

Peter Mueller --
The eighth-overall pick in 2006 has come a long way in a short time. That’s saying something considering that he was the Western Hockey League rookie of the year prior to being drafted and had a strong camp with the Coyotes last summer.

“We had a chance to watch Peter at our development camp recently, and we were very impressed by the amount of development he’s had between last summer and this summer,” says Treliving. “He knows what to expect a little more, and has a better sense now of exactly what it takes to be a pro. There was already a good foundation, and he’s building on it very nicely.”

This past season, the 6-foot-2, 205 pound Mueller posted 78 points, including 57 assists, for the Everett Silvertips in 51 WHL regular-season games. In the postseason, he had 16 points in 12 games. He sees the ice very well, and has worked hard to improve both his skating and his two-way approach.

“We really like the package of skills that Peter brings and we think he’s got the chance to be a special talent. Now, having said that, we’re not going to rush him,” says Treliving.

Mueller, who turned 19 in April, will come to camp with the big club. While there’s a chance that he could make Wayne Gretzky’s opening night lineup, another year of junior development and a potential shot at playing for Team USA at the World Junior Championships certainly wouldn’t hurt. He was invited to the Team USA camp taking place in Lake Placid, but was unable to attend due to a minor injury.

*le sigh*

Let's catch up on a few things:

• Casa McP will be changing a bit... MissRoomie is moving in with the Director of the pageant and so Roomie2 will be moving in at the end of the month. She's nice and cute and likes wine - it's all good to me! :) We'll be replacing a few things and rearranging. MissRoomie is still going to come over for slumber parties, etc. Honestly, I'm pretty devistated about it, but having a positive outlook. New life experiences.
• the McMan and I made it official on Monday night - therefore, he is the McB/F. I'm sure as hockey season starts some of his comments and observations will show up here and at the HLOG. Oh, and he's getting dish so we can watch hockey in HD. YESSSSSSSS! There's nothing like being with someone who understands the love of the sport!
• Went to the Martina McBride concert on Tuesday. OH. My. DUDE! She was amazing. She is now on my list of "Fem Boners" with Christina Aguilera and Idina Menzel.
• The Canucks aquired a player from St Louis... I'm pretty sure his name starts with a "Z" and ends with an "ack Fitzgerald." HA!
• The Bruins don't disappoint - they signed Zach Hammill (the player we love to hate from Everett) and (former Am) Sean Curry. Upon informing Hammer of the sitch, she said, "Wow! The tips might not be #1 this year! Wait, neither will the Ams, :("
• Throwing a baby shower on Saturday for Prego Mego! SO stoked! YAY! Baby will be here in about 3 weeks!
• I need a nap.
• Finally got Quickbooks for the office - my life is SO much easier!
• I was caller #11 this morning for Nickelback tickets - they were looking for #12. I sent the flying monkeys to throw some poo.

Warning! Funniness ahead!

My bestie Chris is my #1 guy on the myspace (and the reason i can say, "It's OK, I'm with the band.). I filled out a bulletin/survey that you will read below... following that is the hilariosity that followed:

1) Who is he?
Chris... one of my besties and former neighbor before he and his pigeon-filled BBQ moved to a land far far away. (a whole 10 minutes instead of 10 seconds)

2) Do you trust him?
More than most people I know put together

3) When’s the last time you talked to him?
Saturday while I was at Targét

4) Does he have a girlfriend?
Negatory, Ghost rider, the pattern is full.

5) Is he one of your friends?
Um, Duh?

6) Where does he live?
the Land of Rich

7) Is he older than you?
Oui

8) Are you related to him?
Nope

9) Would you do anything for him?
I would... well, short of stabbing myself in the eye with a searing hot french-fry. We'll leave that to the crazy squirrels.

10) Do you have a nickname for him?
He's listed as "Stewart" in my phone... everyone calls him Blinky, but I usually just call him Chris... Oh! Or Rabbi Herschel.

11) How long have you known him?
about 2 years now

12) Do you think he will repost this?
Most likely not, but he might read it?

He repsonded in an email to me:

12) Do you think he will repost this?
Most likely not, but he might read it? You are correct! haha. I only post bulletins when they promote shows that I'm playing... we all know that I'm egotistical like that, haha.

So I'm not hip enough to repost this, but I will email it back to you:

1) Who is she?
Merrick McP-Dizzle

2) When’s the last time you talked to her?
Earlier today

3) Do you know her middle name?
I'm going to take a guess at this one and say Zambindosiaplasopheria

4) Does she have a boyfriend?
Hmmmmm.... I think that her and Mike made it official but I've honestly never gotten the official press release on the subject.

5) Is she one of your friends?
Friends is a word that's tossed around so lightly these days. Let's just say she's my favorite daughter of Israel ;)

6) where does she live?
In reality: Washington
In her dreams: Anywheresville Canada

7) Is she older than you?
No way. I think she's 19... maybe 20... ;)

8) Would you do anything for her?
I would not stab myself in the eye with a searing hot french fry, but other than that.... yeah, pretty much.

9) Do you have a nickname for her?
Mer Dawg, Mo McPhizzle, MC McPherson,

10) How long have you known her?
approximately as long as its been since the first time I met her.

11) Do you think she will repost this?
Not a second time... or will she... I shall ponder this in greater detail on the toilet.... or I'll read Maxim.... I haven't decided yet... only time will tell.

After exchanging a couple emails about his current g/f sitch (or lack-there-of) I replied with:

There's nothing wrong with that. Hopefully she feels the same way... and if she doesn't? (well, we both know how much i think of you - you're my rabbi, for moses' sake!) it's her loss... yours too, b/c she's a great girl, but if she can't be with you right now, for whatever reason, she's the one making the decision to give up - not you.

Either way, Chin-up Herschel, you've given this your best shot and put your best yarmulke forward. If she decides to let you go, there are a lot of shiksa's in the sea, my friend.

Ok, so here's the funny part:

Well, I’m glad you think it was the right move. Your use of Yiddish in our emails is quite entertaining by the way. Let’s see if I can get this right:

Rabbi: The guy in charge of saying things like “Oy” and “What are you talking about, $3.95?! for split pea soup?”

Moses: The guy in charge of saying things like “I’m schvitzing like a mohel over here!” and inspiring Mel Brooks comedic genius.

Shvitzing: Sweating

Mohel: The guy who nips the tip!

Herschel: Yiddish translation for Christopher

Shiksa: Yiddish translation for “Perks of being in a band”

My tearful response to him:

Today, my son, You become a man!

I get back:

So what type of mitzvah would this be? Bar or bots?

and finally:

Bar is when you become a man... Bat is when you become a woman... Bots can be when you become Optimus Prime

Oh good death... THAT was a good laugh...

The Return of McPhizzle

First off, I'd like to thank my little pretties for updating everyone yesterday on what's going on in my life. I added them to the design of the page as a thank-you. Now, onto the good stuff!

Yesterday, Hammer had an appointment to get her car fixed at the Honda dealership up here, so when she was done, I met her for dinner at the preferred dining establishment of the Maple Leaf Mafia, Fiesta Mexican Restaurant. If any of you are ever in the Tri-Cities Metropolitan Area (*giggle*) we all highly reccomend it - Traditional Mexican Cuisine in a Family dining atmosphere with locations in Kennewick and Pasco. (No, we don't get paid, we're just preferred guests.)

Dinner was DELECTIBLE, as always, and Hammer gave me my birthday present - a limited edition mug from Timmy Hortons that had a little packet of Timmy Hortons coffee inside! YESSS!!

After we ordered Laces' to-go burritos, we crossed the street to Starbucks for some yummys - aka 2 Venti, Soy, Sugar-free Cinnamon Dolcé Lattés. So, I go through the drive through and order. The voice coming from the speaker sounded a little angsty, but whatever, right? Well, I get to the window and the girl was just a raging bitch with attitude. Just because I looked super foxy yesterday doesn't mean you need to be rude, you angsty whore.

So we get back to Casa McP and MissRoomie (as she will now be refered to) was getting ready to go to a 'football' (aka soccer) game with her dude. She brought the crown out so Hammer could see the sparkly and left, looking super cute.

Hammer and I looked around on the intermanet for a few minutes and found a place we can get our rubber stamp of the MLM logo made and contacted VonHammer for a version of the logo without the beautiful faces of the female members (the better to stamp you with, my love). Score big on that front.

Then we busted out with the Main Event: NHLopoly!
I had one of the flying monkeys keep a running log of some of the funnier moments and comments:

• Hammer ADMITTED TO CHEATING!!! That just had to be noted.
• (When it's only 2 players, they play the quick-start game, we each pick 4 properties to start with and then buy the rest as they land on them) Hammer got Pheonix (one of the purple 'streets/teams' right after you pass go) in the "lottery" and Florida (the other one) in the first couple turns. Her comment was, "With $500 I could build Arenas (hotels) on this shit right now!"
• McP ended up with some nice draws from the lottery - including Dallas and Minnesota, who just happen to be of the same monopoly (red). Hammer's comment, "That red hair is a sign that you're Satan."
• When McP bought the Pens, Hammer bitterly said, "OH yeah? Well, you're in charge of bailing Jordan out of jail now." It also should be noted that she also owned Carolina - and spent 12+ turns in Jail.... Karma or Coincedence? No one knows.
• Hammer went straight from empty lots on the purple monopoly to Arenas. "Yeah. Suck it! It's a whole $200 if you land on it."
• McP got a Get Out Of Jail Free card, "The Staals should've had one of these bad boys in their pockets!"
• McP landed on Florida. The rent was announced at $450 with the Arena built. "$450?! For FLORIDA?! Oh come. On. No one CARES about Florida. Do they even have a TEAM?!"
  Hammer's comment, "I know, that's what I thought. You must be Jokinen!"
• For a while it seemed like McP had the NHLopoly mojo.... Hammer, never being the most gracious loser said, "As long as I win in the end, I'm ok." Fair enough.
• "Oh. Awesome. You're building luxury boxes (houses) with the money I just gave you!" Protested McP after forking over a heft sum to Hammer for 'rent.'
  "What did you expect me to do?" Hammer laughed, "Just sit here and look at it?"
  McP giggled, "That would've been the polite thing to do."
  "I'll look at it.... Look at it going into the bank with little houses in return!"
• Landing on Pitsburgh with a luxury box built was a little steeper than Hammer thought it was going to be, as she begrugingly handed over the colorful scratch, she said, "Will this pay for young Jordan's bail?"
• While speaking of Vinny Lecavilier, the girls lamented over his pretty face in a tux at the NHL awards and the subject of his (as Hammer called her) hooker-of-a-woman came up. Here's the convo that followed,
  H: She's probably not REALLY a hooker.
  McP: No, she really is.
  H: Some Quebequois hooker... How do you say 'hooker' in French? Hook-aire?
• Insert the break they took to read Margee's brilliant insider-recap of the Bachelor party that concluded with handcuffs - and not the good kind - for the Staal boys. (Affectionately refered to by the MLM as Staalgate 2007) And then for some tissues for the tears that were rolling down their cheeks from copious ammounts of laughter.
• McP also needed to place her Arbonne order before 10:00pm PST so that it could be in the mails today, so that took a few minutes. She made a phonecall to the automated bank number to check her balance - after accidentally pressing a wrong button, the amount of $4,300-something was coming over the speakerphone - after almost losing her Fiesta, she realized she was listening to the amount remaining on her car loan. Oh well, jackpot shall be hit some other time.
• Reviving the Great MLM Spit-Lisp, when Hammer landed on Nashville, she said, "Schea it ischen't scho!!" Ah, the Weber....
• By far, the most landed on property of the night was Anaheim (the first magenta property after Jail). McP especially landed on it after the 4 luxury boxes and Arena was built. "$625 for a Todd Bertuzzi Booty Call?! Damn, this better be worth it."
  "Obviously it is, b/c you keep going back!"
• After the Arena was built on Phoenix, the rent went from $2 to $250. The girls figured that was the cost of the medical bills to cure the Syph one might contract from a few certain players who shall remain nameless (unless someone asks for them)
• In the end, the Godfather of NHLopoly won again.... If you play with Hammer, chances are, you're going to be sleepin with the fishes...

All-in-all, a FANTASTIC night was had at the gathering of the MLM... as it always is.

Do you know how hard it is to type with no opposable thumbs?!

This update on our dear McPhizzle is brought to you by the flying monkeys here at the Musings.

Our radical redhead has been a non-blogger the past couple weeks, so we thought we'd let you know what she's been doing.

#1) McP has a McMan. First time in a couple years that this has gone on, so she's pretty excited about it. We've met him. He's smart, funny, nice, cute, he's a huge hockey fan, he treats her like a princess and puts up with her Radical Redheaded-ness. And he's got the cutest (and smallest) cat in the world, Cika - she likes to attack McP's hair. We know the feeling, little feline!

#2) McP has left year 23 and started year 24. So far, VERY good. Then again, this year couldn't be any worse than last, that's for sure. Sister didn't make it up to visit from Vega$ b/c she flew over the handlebars of a Vespa and broke her wrist, but that's OK. McP, the McMan and his McFriends are planning a trip down there in November, so the family reunion is still going to happen... eventually. We're going to hide in her luggage and try our hand at the slots. "Big money, no whammies!!"

#3) Roomie won the pageant!!!!! She will be competing for Miss WA next July - then on to Miss America in January! (Yes, we know we're getting ahead of ourselves there, but we're confident monkeys). McP is absolutely elated for her. Actually, when they announced her as the winner, McP jumped up, screamed and started crying - much like if she had won herself. Don't let Roomie know, but when neither of them are home, we fly around Casa McP with the crown on. A monkey's gotta look good, you know? McP has also been inspired to lose a few more pounds, get back into "Physical Fitness in Swimwear" shape and run for Miss WA USA... She's got a few months til she wants to apply - we're rooting her on.

#4) The weather here has been... well, McP calls it awesome, we call it FREAKIN HOT! Highs in the upper 90's (F) and even up to 110! The McMan has a pool in his back yard and LURVES to BBQ, so McP is benefitting from the chance to be a little fishie without the screaming, splashing urchins at the pool at Casa McP and the deliciousness that is the McMan's grilling prowess. She said it's like having her very own Bobby Flay. We're just glad that he doesn't say, "Who's your daddy?!" when he's patting the hamburger patties into shape.

#5) She's a little battered and bruised right now. She and the McMan went out on the river with some of his McFriends on Sunday and whilst inner-tubing behind the boat, she was thrown off and according to the McMan, she did about 4 flips in the air before hitting the water. Her right leg is pretty bruised up... And the back of her left leg... and her right arm. But other than that and a stiff neck, she's ok - thanks to her trusty life-jacket! Boat smart, boat safe, kiddies!

That is it for now. We're sure she'll be back to her blogging self in no time at all. Less than 30 days 'til Ams Camp starts!

Our Jungle Love (oh-wee-oh-wee-oh),
The Flying Monkies

Oh no you di-in't!

Watching this directly after lunch is not a good thing if your tummy is full - it may or may not have brought McPhizzle to the point of almost vomiting from laughing so hard. Luckily, the flying monkies showed her the logo of the Edmonton OilKings to bring her back down.

This video is entitled "Message for Bob"



I'm not sure, but I think it might have something to do with the cutest Edmonton OilKing in the VERLD. The little gnome is onto something ;o)

"A Whole New Teeeeaaaammmmm!"

Imagine me singing that on the flying carpet ride at WDW....

In all seriousness, though, TraderBob has pulled another trick out of his bag-o-trades and traded Chris Inglis (aka "Heeead!") to the Lethrbidge Hurricanes for a 17 y/o Defenseman. (article)

New kid is big - 6'2" 205#... He'll be reporting to training camp in August.

We'll miss you and your huge noggin, Christopher! (and your mom and dad, they're a kick in the pants!)

Clarification

After a rather angry email was recieved by the flying monkeys at the Musings, let me clarify some things:

1) This blog is filled with my personal opinions. in America, we can do that... freedom of speech is a WONDERFUL thing. I don't apologize for things I write here because I write what I feel and after years and years of holding things in, I'm done. I have to get it out or I get physically and mentally sick. If you don't like it, don't read it. I wont be offended, I promise.

2) Juraj "Big Guy" Valach was a great kid. I stuck up for him all season to people and fans who didn't think he was playing as well as he could, which he wasn't - he even said it multiple times. I stood behind that kid 100% and you can ask anyone about that. I was definitely his #3 fan in Tri (ma and pa being #'s 1 & 2). My mom and dad cared a lot for him and were very hurt by his words and decision not to come back to Tri. Being hurt and angry and not agreeing with his tactics doesn't mean we hate him or don't wish him well in the future... He's just got a lot of growing up to do, still.

3) I am a Christian by choice and practice, but Jewish by birth. That will never change. All my life I've grown up knowing the horrors of the haulocaust and what hatred and ugliness the Nazis stood for. A swastika isn't something I find humourous. I don't find ANY jokes about any of those things funny. I don't care if they're by stupid teenage boys who don't know any better or real Neo-Nazis.... Millions of people died for being who they were. If I had lived in Europe at that time, I probably would've been one of them, MAYBE one of the lucky ones who got out alive. Sure it's an emotional button that doesn't get pushed on everyone, but maybe it should be.

I'm stepping off of my soap box now.

It's a Hot Day, Charlie Brown

Good grief. I was gonna update on the 4th (since i spent it at 2 different shindigs with 2 different hockey families), but it's flipping 108* outside.

ONE HUNDRED AND EIGHT!

I walked outside to turn the sprinklers on and it felt like I had opened the oven to check and see if the cookies were burnt.

Only 30 min until I blow this popsicle stand and grab my bikini on the way to Mike's to spend the evening in his pool. Oh, cold, chlorine-y goodness, I hear you calling my name. I'll be there soon.... And speaking of popsicles, i hope Mike has a grape one left... YUM.

O'CANADA!!!

(x-posted to Maple Leaf Mafia)

This Lactose-free Canada Day is brought to you in honour of Matty Swaby.

July 1st... The day Canada celebrates their Independance! YAY!

Headed to M.F. for a day of celebrating the Homeland. Hammer had maple cookies ready and a maple leaf flag banner up. We started the afternoon with a rousing game of NHLopoly. I would've won if I hadn't have let Hammer cheat and stay in jail in order to avoid the "ticket prices" in Ottawa with the arena built. She won. Lame. Now I know not to be so congenial.

We tagged my car with red car-chalk. Violette (my vehicle) is still proudly rockin' "CANADA DAY '07" on her back windshield.

The roster ended up beign rather full - The whole female contingent of the Maple Leaf Mafia was there (Hammer, VonHammer, Laces and McPhizzle) along with 3 of Hammer's friends and 1 little nugget named Michael - the little 18-mo.-old cutie that totally stole the show.

We all wore "Canadian leis" (aka red mardi-gras beads that left our necks pink - Mike thought I had gotten sunburned when I got home), and most of us were wearing some combination of red, black and white (we let VonHammer slide with the HNIC shirt). We also put temporary tattoos on our faces. When Laces came in she asked, "Can't I put it on my guns?" Your guns?! No, now you HAVE to put it on your face for asking that way.

Before we ate dinner, the Canadian Anthem was sung reverantly at the picnic table.

the Alberta Beef Tenderloin with Gingered Saskatoon Berry Compote was AMAZING!! As was the potato salad (in honour of PEI's 65 varieties of potaoes, of course... Who knew they had that many?! "Is there enough land to grow that many there?" "Maybe a row of each?" "We found a new variety of potato, eh!" "Well, go plant it next to the other 64, eh!").

After dinner, the fun and games began. We took a Canadian History test... We should've studied. lol. Question #15 was "Which part of the US space shuttle was designed by Canadians?" VonHammer was QUITE excited that she knew the answer and when Hammer was reading the correct answers aloud, she shouted at the top of her lungs, "ROBOTIC ARM!!!!!" which we affectionately re-named the CanadArm.

Somehow the topic of Lester B Pearson (14th Prime Minister of Canada) and how he got the nickname "Mike." Apparently "Lester" didn't sound tough enough, so they picked a new name for him. Odd little tidbit there. Apparently Mike is a tough name.

After the quiz, we started playing the "Great Canadian Adventure" board game that Hammer uses as a Friday treat in the Canadian History course she teaches.

• One of the questions Hammer gave to Laces was, "Who is the Canadian Hockey player who they call The Great One...." we all groaned and rolled our eyes at the easiness, especially since questions to the rest of us were freakin hard...
• When someone landed on a "Heroes" space, VonHammer shouted, "TERRY FOX!!!!" before her sister could even begin to read the question aloud. Hammer's response? "Great, now I have to choose a new one."
• To make up for the ease of Laces' queston, the next question posed to me was "WHo was the first Aboriginal head coach in the NHL... I matched VonHammer's intesity yelling, "TED NOLAN!!!!" (and as always, I added, "he's on LonGisland!")
• Our little nugget got to roll the large, neon pink dice for his mom and dad. He beaned Laces with it once. (a Picture Essay will follow once they are transfered onto my computer from VonHammer's camera)
• Hammer and I started fighting about how the only reason she won the NHLopoly game was b/c I let her cheat... when our voices had raised to their limit and I ran out of little sister things to say, to end the argument I said, "IT'S A GLITCH!" the laughter and thought of Brad and Vinny stopped the arguing at once.
• As the questions got harder, Hammer gave us hints... She's a master of disguising names in hints.... here are a couple examples, "It rhymes with Schmick Schmanson" (Rick Hanson), "It rhymes with Meline Sleon" (Celine Dion) and my personal favourite, "It rhymes with Muffalo." (Buffalo)

When we'd been sufficently munched on by the mosquitos, we went inside for a little chatting and so Laces and The Nugget could play a little pick-up game of carpet hockey with the pink hockey sticks I picked up at Target in the Holiest of places, the Dollar Spot. Laces' comment about her opponent, "We're about the same height, so it's ok."

While the game was going on, the father of the Nugget gave us his opinion of hockey, "They serve beer and get in fights. Its a good game."

When he finished telling us about a game he'd been to in Seattle where there were something like 8 fights and 6 were the same guy on Seattle, my comment was, "I bet his name started with a 'Z' and ended with 'ack FitGerald'."

During the conversation about that particular T-Bird, the puck went under the little breakfast nook and behind a scrapbook organizer and it turned into a scrum along the boards at my feet, so i blew the fake whistle, bent down and dropped the puck back on the playing surface. VonHammer's comment, "The Ice Girls got that one."

When it was time for the Nugget to head home, he was QUITE sad to leave the Canadian and hockey goodness. We gave him his first taste of hockey and he's hungry for more!! :) Corrupting young minds. That's what the Maple Leaf Mafia is all about.